Do you have that one person in your life who is unique and fun to be around? They have jokes, charisma, good advice but what makes them stand out are the qualities that make them easy to talk to and be around.
When a person is easy to talk to, they have that “it” factor with a conversation, and family and friends feel appreciated and understood.
Our easy to talk to friends lack negative traits such as selfishness, insincerity, selfishness, and tend not to complain.
When people are optimistic, cheerful, and charming, they don’t have the daily negative thoughts or habits that put people off.
Here are 8 Skills That Make You Easy To Talk To:
- Let the other person talk more
- Encourage and be positive
- Ask them about their interests
- Understand what they’re going through
- Don’t judge
- Laugh with them
- Switch to other topics
- Make Eye Contact
Let’s go deeper into each one of these qualities so you can learn how to be easy to talk to.
How To Be Easy To Talk To
Let The Other Person Talk
We love to talk about ourselves, and this is proven by science that we spend almost 40 percent of conversation speaking about ourselves.
I’m not a massive talker by personality; I believe that’s why I’m easy to talk to. I remain engaged in the conversation allowing the other person to express themselves and do most of the talking.
During a conversation, you will be tempted to interrupt and share what you have to say, but the trick is to hold off and continue to focus on the other person first.
People enjoy talking about themselves, and research has shown that it is pleasurable. The brain’s reward centers are lit up by good food, cocaine, and sex also are activated by talking about yourself.
It makes sense people feel good and positively about a conversation where they are in the spotlight.
It’s even entirely possible that the other person might feel that someone is hearing them for the first time in a while.
Encourage And Be Positive
Keep venting and complaining to a minimum, as it’s much easier to be around people who do. People don’t like perpetual complainers.
People who don’t complain project a positive attitude and tend to think of solutions instead of problems. Keeping a positive attitude is easier said than done, but the person you’re talking to will find you more likable.
When a conversation feels good, it’s usually easy too. Throughout your discussion, try to offer genuine compliments about something the other person said.
A few kind words and encouragement can go along way, making you easy to talk to.
Ask Them About Their Interests
When you talk with someone who shares mutual interests, it is easier to engage and share stories.
You may not find the right topic right away but slowly keep asking questions until you find something you have in common.
It’s shown by research; we tend to gravitate towards people who are similar to us. This is called the similarity-attraction effect, where we share like-minded attitudes and values.
If you don’t fully understand or have another person’s same interest, you can still say things you know about that interest.
When you don’t share the other person’s interest, keep the conversation positive and ask thoughtful questions.
Find common interests as this makes it easy to talk to someone. You could talk about easy things like family, work or school. You can form a bond with someone over fun things in life or sharing struggles, and that will make you seem easy to talk to.
Understand What They’re Going Through
We all have struggles, and sometimes people want you to listen to what they’re going through.
If they seem to be going through something, ask about the challenges they’re facing in life. Ask them how things are going for them right now.
When they open up about their struggle, listen attentively and genuinely. Ask them questions if the conversation allows them and dive deeper into their emotions and thoughts.
Show you care about what’s happening and what they’re going through.
People will often feel you’re easy to talk to when they are comfortable opening up about their thoughts and emotions.
People like to be heard and understood, but they don’t want to be judged for their thoughts. Don’t judge them for how they feel or what they’ve done or are going through.
It’s not always easy, and it’s not our place to judge, but most people find I’m easy to talk to because I don’t criticize them for what they are thinking.
If you disagree with someone in a kind and gentle way, offer your thoughts while still respecting them. Forcing someone to see your point of view can be a turn-off.
Deep conversations happen when you are open to hearing about the other person’s ideas instead of forcing yours on them.
If you are non-judgemental toward someone, they will think you’re easy to talk to.
Laugh With Them
Laughter between two people helps make a great connection and is one of the most comfortable conversations. During the discussion, find a way to kid about yourself or your situation and have a good laugh.
Laughter is the best medicine, so to speak, to make you easy to talk to. Everyone likes to laugh, and it helps take the edge off of any situation and makes people feel comfortable around you.
Ask Questions That Lead To Other Topics
A healthy and normal conversation will lead to other discussion topics by asking the right types of questions.
For example, instead of the question, “Where are you from?” ask, “So what’s cool about where you are from?”
Using different wording will give you a more in-depth back-and-forth instead of a one-word answer.
If a conversation feels seamless, people tend to enjoy talking to you. It’s easy to talk to someone who can talk about different things and keep the discussion flowing. Not everybody has this simple trait, but with practice, you can become good at it.
Make Eye Contact
When you have a conversation with someone, make sure you make eye contact with them. I understand it’s hard for some, but making eye contact is critical.
You don’t want to stare continuously at the person as this may freak them out, so the general rule of thumb is to look for a few seconds and then look away. Then back again.
This makes for a natural amount of eye contact and is enough for the person to feel acknowledged and making you easy to talk to.
You’re Easy To Talk To
These simple techniques are all you need, so people feel it’s not hard to talk to you. Most importantly is paying attention and being in the moment, and not letting your mind wander.
Reread the post if you need to, and continue to follow these simple tips when you meet someone new and have a conversation.
Be mindful and don’t pass judgment on others as you wouldn’t want to be judged yourself. Make the conversation fun and upbeat, and enjoy yourself.
When you see someone you’d like to talk with, go up to them and strike up a conversation, if you work on these skills, you will be easy to talk to.
How Can I Be More Fun To Talk To?
There are many different ways to be fun to talk to and, most importantly, being in the moment and paying attention to the conversation. Here are some pointers of how to be more fun to talk to:
- Ask follow up questions
- Be positive
- Don’t just give yes or no answers
- Give compliments
- Give return questions
- Remember what people tell you
How Can I Be A Good Person To Talk To?
Here’s how you can be a good person to talk to:
- Encourage people to talk about themselves
- Don’t try to impress
- Ask questions
- Find similarities
- Listen to what they say
- Progress the conversation
- Be enthusiastic and have emotion
- Give compliments